Feb 182014


A new day

I am beginning to come back to myself

sunlight has returned to the Blue Ridge

a sense of hope returns

there is pale green on a mountain close by

I think about a strange dream of intimacy

love extended and quickly withdrawn

I think that life goes like that sometimes…


I ask the wind

to please not return for now

I ask the liars

to please not return forever

I ask to see beauty

in your face, and you in mine

I ask to bury anger

before it becomes something ugly–in myself


I wish to try to reach out to you

but I am afraid

I wish to open doors

that have been closed for decades

I wish to close this circle in my life

I wish for wounds to heal

I wish for secrets to be revealed

if there are any secrets…


I wake up at 3 a.m. no matter what

Only the cats and me are awake

I sit to write notes, then to reflect

I stare out into the darkness

I wish for darkness

to turn to light

I sit at Panera drinking java

The darkness is dispelled from my mind


I’m turning 70

I think this is the right time

to pursue some therapy

with the right person, not just anybody

I’ve been in the field

I know how good or bad they can be

I want to explore grief issues

and where life is taking me in 2014


I fear the country is in danger

of turning fascist

But I’m not turning fascist with it

The America I love does not seek

to oppress and denigrate the poor

the disabled, the strange and different

and creative…The America I love

does not seek to destroy people of conscience


I wish to play basketball again

just shoot around, my legs are gone

but my shot remains true

I could play horse, maybe “21”

and hold my own, even with Barack

I like to recall ghetto courts

and college courts, the release I found

the sense of moving forward


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