When things fall apart
You rebuild your life
One step at a time
One dish washed
One counter wiped
One face washed
One cup of java brewed
One cat fed
One poem written
One meditation pursued
One to-do list compiled
Medicine taken
Slowly, slowly
I’m always afraid
When I write a dark poem
People are going to worry about me
or try to reassure me
but just remember…
The poet goes
where the spirit leads
The poet doesn’t worry
about walking down
a dark road or light
The poem is okay
The poet is alright
Just baring his soul
Pain in shoulder from throwing too many baseballs as a kid
Hours against the wall of our tenement
or practicing or in a game
The old pains come back as we age
We deal with it…or not
Same with emotional trauma
The old pains come back
Important to deal with pain and trauma
It can be managed
People say you only played till you were 18
They what realize what damage you can do as a kid
Pain that must be faced and dealt with
emotional or physical
I am in pain, my shoulder
Lily the cat follows me around
when I am in pain
She knows
Better than some people
Some cats are like that
Empathic
It reassures
Her just being aware
A form of acceptance
and love
The cat Lily is a prize possession
but I do not possess her
“The heart is aglow, rises up through the stony ground…” (U2)
Rode a city bus to K-Mart to work
Sick to my stomach, wandering in a field
of scrub brush and discarded appliances
on stony ground
My life in pre-homelessness…
My employer had no idea
I was struggling like this
(or maybe he did)
It did matter
What mattered was making it back
to my rooming house before dark
Walking back, no bus fare
on the ghetto side of State St.